In this blog post, we reflect on why we avoid talking about death and only grasp its meaning at life’s end.
Facing Death
Every human being will eventually face death. Death is as natural and inevitable as growing old. Yet in modern society, discussing death is often considered taboo, and people tend to avoid it intensely. When someone brings up death, most people react uncomfortably, sometimes responding with, “Why bring up such an unlucky topic?” This is because the subject of death is uncomfortable or evokes fear. People do not want to face death and perceive the concept negatively. Consequently, we turn away from death in daily life, treating it as if it were unrelated to us. Yet death is inescapable for humans, and ignoring it does not make it disappear. Rather, the reason it is important to confront and accept death is that doing so allows us to find deep reflection and meaning in our present lives.
In modern society, we only begin to seriously contemplate our own death when it is imminent. Yet by that point, it is often too late. Reflection on death should be prepared in advance and naturally embraced from youth. Death is not merely the end of life; it serves as a mirror reflecting life itself. Leo Tolstoy’s ‘The Death of Ivan Ilyich’ exemplifies this perspective. In this work, the protagonist Ivan Ilyich lived as a successful judge, but one day, stricken with an incurable illness, he is confronted with the reality of death. Facing death, he looks back on his life and deeply reflects on the true meaning of life and death. Ivan Ilyich’s story prompts readers to reconsider death and plays a crucial role in helping them find meaning in life.
Denial and Acceptance of Death
Initially, Ivan Ilyich refuses to accept his impending death, denying it and succumbing to anger. He rebels against the fact that he must die, constantly asking, “Why must I die?” He is gripped by fear and dread of death, trying to ignore its meaning, but ultimately realizes death is an inescapable reality. Through this process of denial and acceptance, he finally reflects on the life he has lived and comes to understand the true value of life through death.
Similarly, many people find it difficult to accept their own death, viewing it as something distant and trying to avoid it. Death is ultimately an inevitable experience for everyone, yet people tend to think of it as something separate from their own lives. When Ivan Ilyich’s fellow judges heard of his death, their first thoughts were of personal gain—promotions or transfers. They felt relief at Ivan Ilyich’s death, believing it had nothing to do with them. This reaction clearly shows humanity’s instinctive tendency to view death as irrelevant to oneself.
Yet this attitude prevents us from truly reflecting on our lives and steering them in a desirable direction. Avoiding death prevents us from properly recognizing life’s finitude and its value. We must acknowledge death’s impact on our lives and deeply contemplate what it signifies. Rather than waiting until death, like Ivan Ilyich, to reflect on life, thinking about death beforehand can guide us toward living better lives.
Reflecting on Life Through Death
If we continue living without seriously contemplating death, we easily miss life’s true meaning. Only when facing death does Ivan Ilyich reflect on his life and realize how wrong his existence had been. He believed he had lived rightly and achieved a successful life, but confronting death forces him to admit his life was filled with hypocrisy and pretense. Ivan Ilyich ultimately feels regret for his life, and only on his deathbed does he admit his mistakes and seek forgiveness from his family.
In this way, death provides us with an opportunity to look back on our lives and reflect. However, we are not limited to reflecting on life only when death draws near. Thinking about death is itself a process of reflecting on one’s life, and through this, we can realign the direction of our lives. Through awareness of death, we contemplate how we are living now and how we should live going forward. Just as Ivan Ilyich realized his mistakes and reflected on his life when death was imminent, we too can find life’s true value and live better lives by being conscious of death.
Life and death coexist
Life and death are often seen as opposing concepts. But in truth, they are not separate; they always exist together. Life inherently includes death, and death is a natural part of life. Only upon reaching death does Ivan Ilyich gain the realization that death is not an end but a new beginning. He feared death, but after accepting it, he instead discovered light and felt joy. This shows that only when death is embraced can the meaning of life be fully understood.
Would life truly have meaning without death? Recognizing death as a limit helps us appreciate life’s preciousness and live each day more meaningfully. Acknowledging that death is life’s end allows us to focus more intensely on the present moment, thereby enriching our lives. Rather than merely trying to avoid death, it is necessary to accept it as a natural part of life.
Living with Awareness of Death
Accepting death does not simply mean accepting death itself. By recognizing and accepting death, we gain the motivation to examine our own lives and move in a better direction. The ancient philosophers’ teaching, ‘Memento Mori’ – “remember that you will die someday” – remains relevant today. Remembering death is an important act that makes us cherish our lives and make each day meaningful.
We must stop turning away from death and instead cultivate a culture where we naturally discuss death within the context of life. When we seriously contemplate and accept death, we can discover the true value of life, and in that process, we can live better lives. Death is part of life, and acknowledging this fact allows us to live richer, more meaningful lives. Through reflection prompted by death, the coexistence of death and life, and an attitude of acceptance toward death, we must look back on our own lives and seek answers for how to live going forward. Ultimately, death is a crucial key to understanding life more deeply, and through it, we find opportunities to make life even more valuable.
