In this blog post, we will examine Sinclair’s ceaseless wandering in ‘Demian’ not as personal anxiety but as a process of self-awakening and inner division, thereby exploring the essence of the coming-of-age narrative.
First published in 1919, ‘Demian’ bears the subtitle ‘The Story of Emil Sinclair’s Youth’. The work delivered a scathing critique of the decadent, inert civilization pervasive in pre-World War I European society, along with the contradictory ethics and religious views of the older generation. Consequently, the author had no choice but to publish it anonymously under the pseudonym Emil Sinclair. In this work, Sinclair is established as the name of the protagonist who agonizes over the polarity within the human psyche and wanders in confusion.
The plot of the work is roughly as follows.
Sinclair, who entered a Latin school accessible only to the children of the aristocracy and upper class, had two worlds coexisting within him from the age of ten. One was a stable, peaceful world; the other was a dark realm, complex and alluring, containing terrifying mysteries. Even within this dualistic mental landscape, while he considered the former desirable, he found himself increasingly drawn to the new, the terrifying, the utterly unknowable—things unknown to his previous life.
Then one day, Sinclair met Franz Kromer, a delinquent boy attending the public school. Through him, Sinclair became part of the dark world. To gain Kromer’s recognition and favor, Sinclair began to lie constantly. Gradually, he fell into Kromer’s tight grip. Eventually, he deceived his parents and even stole money. While reading at home, the mere sound of Kromer’s whistle would drag him into the realm of evil, where he endured all manner of humiliation and torment. Unable to bear this suffering, Sinclair often experienced sleep paralysis, vomiting, chills, and even showed signs of mental confusion. He suffers from his first life contradiction, isolated from the bright, peaceful, and stable atmosphere of his home.
For Sinclair, Max Demian, newly enrolled at the Latin school, becomes his sole savior. Demian was the son of a wealthy widow who had recently moved to the town. Though he wore a mourning band on his sleeve, he was a wise, bright-faced boy radiating confidence. Though a few years older than Sinclair, he appeared far more mature for his age and attracted the attention of many students, which also drew Sinclair’s admiration. One day, Demian shared a new interpretation of Cain and Abel with Sinclair, stating that Cain was brave and noble, while Abel was the coward. This revelation deeply shocked Sinclair. Until then, Sinclair had been unable to escape Kromer’s grasp. By chance, Demian learned of Sinclair’s suffering at Kromer’s hands and told him he must never be enslaved to him. After Demian said this, Kromer never appeared before Sinclair again.
Sinclair returned to a bright, stable, and peaceful world, but it was the world of Demian, distinct from the world of his parents’ home. Thus, he sensed that Demian too was another tempter, and that he would form a connection with a new world.
Several years passed after Sinclair parted ways with Chromer, and he entered adolescence. By then, Demian had exerted considerable influence over him. Demian was a peculiar boy who sought closeness with no one and was not close to anyone else. Yet Sinclair was drawn into Demian’s mysterious inner world, becoming completely immersed in his own inner self and striving to emulate Demian. However, the more he tried to follow Demian, the more Sinclair found only loneliness and wandering. Amidst this wandering, he spent his boyhood and eventually reached graduation.
Entering the Gymnasium boarding school, Sinclair was labeled by his peers as gloomy, tight-lipped, and delinquent, spending his days alone. Then, around early November, he happened to meet Alphonse Beck, the oldest boy in the dorm, in a park by the road. After drinking with him, Sinclair found himself conflicted again between the worlds of good and evil, drifting away from home and living a dissolute life with bad friends. Then, one day in early spring, after winter break had passed and fresh green shoots were beginning to sprout, he discovered a girl resembling Raphael’s portrait of a young woman in the very park where he had met Alphonse Beck. He named her ‘Beatrice’ and fell in love. He then returned to his true self, only to be startled upon realizing that the portrait he had accidentally painted of Beatrice did not resemble the Beatrice he loved, but rather bore a striking resemblance to Demian. Yet, when viewed in the light of the setting sun, it also resembled Sinclair himself. He came to understand that this painting ultimately represented the image of fate residing within his own inner self and influencing his life. He continued his inner wandering, fitting in with no one. Though he should have graduated from Gymnasium the following spring and entered university, his wandering persisted. He sought spiritual connection through encounters with Pistorius, the pastor’s son, and his classmate Knauer, but ultimately failed, desperately wishing to meet Demian. So, using his vacation before entering university after graduating from Gymnasium, he met Demian. From him, he heard that a world war would soon break out and that he himself would go to the battlefield. Returning home, the world looked different when he awoke the next morning. A few days later, he met Demian’s mother, Mrs. Eva. Drawn inexplicably to her face, which seemed untouched by time and held only an overflowing will of the soul, he frequently visited her during his university years, spending dreamlike hours with her. However, realizing the relationship could not last, he parted ways with her. Sinclair then also went to the battlefield. While standing guard at a farm in an allied-occupied zone, Sinclair was suddenly buried under a pile of earth by a deafening roar. When he opened his eyes in a daze, he saw Demian’s face. Demian leaned close to Sinclair’s ear and whispered that Sinclair would never see him again. From now on, if Sinclair listened to his own inner self, he would find Demian there. By the time Sinclair regained his senses, Demian’s form had vanished forever. Yet within Sinclair’s inner self resided a figure like Demian—a friend and guide who was none other than himself.
‘Demian’ can be seen as a concise summary of dreamlike tales where love, death, birth, and transformation repeat endlessly. Transformation dominates the entire work, revealing itself as an entity that does not dwell on a single concept but continuously creates new births. Thus, the underlying gloomy, ashen hue of the post-war era in the work is highly significant in that it hints at the possibility of new birth, signaling a new beginning for readers.
